Tough Questions

There are loads of "awareness days" everything from Earth Day to Friendship Day and even a Have a Hug Day. But the one we love the best is on December 3rd, The International Day for Persons with Disabilities, which is today.

What we like is that it is an opportunity to talk about disability and make sure that some of the nonsense and myths are aired and people encouraged to think a little differently. So here goes.

A friend interviewing a blind woman recently was shocked to hear that when her grandmother decided to share out her jewellery with her grandchildren, she made three piles when there were four grandchildren. When the grandmother was asked, she said of the blind granddaughter "what will she need with gold?" The same woman was told to stop being fanciful when she shared with her mother that she wanted to get married and have a family of her own. So, what do you think? Were the grandmother and mother, right? Do you also think that it is fanciful for a blind person to consider marriage?

Rohit works in MESH shop keeping the shelves stocked and serving customers. He has cerebral palsy, is shaky and not really able to talk. But there are some customers who especially look out for him to serve them and appreciate his abilities. How would you feel if a person like that were to serve you in a shop?

I saw a brief video recently of a hearing-impaired woman who has trained as a beautician and set up her own beauty parlor in her hometown. Have you ever considered what it might be like to have your beauty treatment from a person who cannot hear? Are you worried you won't be able to tell her what treatment you want or that she might not be properly trained?

So, these are provocative questions designed to make you at least think about people with disabilities today and to figure out for yourself what your response might be. Are you the sympathetic type who thinks that people with disabilities need helping, along with a dose of pity? Or maybe you are like the grandmother, quite clear that they are misfits in society and have no right to think of living as other do? Or perhaps you are frightened and a bit embarrassed because you are unsure how to respond to someone who is different.

Now let me share some truths. Probably the most important thing to understand is that people with disabilities desire all that everyone else desires and there are very few good reasons why they should not be included in mainstream life for marriage and employment, have full social lives and experience the joys and challenges of living life to the full. The struggles are theirs. Do you imagine that Rohit has not found a way to communicate with customers? Or that the deaf beautician won't be always trying to make her parlor a good place to visit? The blind woman should be treated on par with her siblings for marriage and the division of property and there are plenty of blind women who are married with their own families. Today is their day; you can either ignore it or introspect and try and understand your own prejudices and preconceived notions because they might be wrong, unfair and sometimes just plain silly.

One last thought. A family with five blind children had to leave the village of their birth because of the cruelty of the other villagers. It is unclear what motivated the other villagers, perhaps they considered such a family as bad luck, or somehow cursed and a risk. It certainly seems there was some kind of ignorance driving the meanness. But now two of those children are grown, educated and working in banks. I think the last laugh is with them. Don't you?